As I normally get up later on the weekends anyway, I woke up for my early morning meditation at about 5:45, drank a bulletproof coffee, had a snack (couple pieces of cheese), and vaporized a small amount of cannabis (an indica blend, if that’s relevant).
I did my early morning meditation at about 6:20 this morning. I went into some of my processes for the larger work I’m doing – for the life partner work, I do something that the author Kathryn Alice calls a “soul call” (I’ll discuss this in another post because Alice’s work has been an influence on my own, and something I want to do in the future is to train with her as a coach) – and found that during some of the visualizations, things kept coming up for me. Unpleasant things. If I had been fully awake and unmedicated while attempting this, then I might have been able to more forcefully direct the flow of my imagination. But as it was, I could not imagine the person there without also imagining that this person was unpleasant, odd, flippant, controlling, manipulative, had a personality I didn’t enjoy, et cetera. I just did not like the fellow who was springing to my mind’s eye. What was notable was that this person I was visualizing, was someone I might have been attracted to in the past.
I was not imagining someone with whom I wanted to share a relationship.
I realized that this was basically baggage from previous relationship experiences. I decided to calm myself down and try again. This time, I was in a much better space. As per my work with other systems such as Huna, I asked my subconscious to show me someone I might actually enjoy, who might actually enjoy me. This worked out much better, though it’s a sort of person I have not been with in the past. I realized that my tastes have changed and that I am looking for a more mature, grounded individual now. I got a lot of information from my subconscious that ended up going into my journal.
What I took away from this experience was that I realized that what I’m attracted to now, has nothing to do with what I’ve been with in the past. I’ve dated many people with the personality of the unpleasant person, but for whatever reason, found many of those traits attractive (until they weren’t anymore).
It’s common that I fall asleep at the end of this work. That’s fine, given I wake up after about 5 hours of sleep to do this work, and get the rest of my sleep after. This time, I drifted in and out of sleep, and at some point, recognized that I was in the state between waking and sleeping, and starting to astral project. I actually saw my astral arms in front of me as looking kind of smoky/cloudy, like they were made of a white smokelike substance, while my flesh arms lay on the bed.
I went ahead and decided to roll out, and go exploring. It was probably one of my easier times doing this (I’m getting better at it). Astral projection can be a bit like learning to operate a flight simulator, and I felt a good handle on movement and navigation. I remembered to stay calm as excitement, strong emotion, etc, tends to jolt me back into my body.
I didn’t go very far, but this time, I saw other projectors, as well as people who were aware of me, unless I was actually dreaming that. There were some lucid dreaming-like aspects to this experience.
But I’m getting a good set of references for the “feel” of uncontrolled (typical) dreams, vs astral and lucid experiences.
An experiment for me will be to see, at some point, if I can contact other projectors, and also to see if I can combine projection with “soul call” type of work (soul calls aren’t just for love partners, it’s for pretty much any type of arrangement you want to make that might involve another person – clients, etc).
I’ve experienced before that I’ve “programmed” some of my astral and lucid experiences via the self-hypnosis work I do (this is why it’s necessary to repeat my self-hypnosis sessions – you’re embedding things into your subconscious). But that would be more like using an exterior script to hack into something. Why do that when I can work with the machine code itself?
Which is the point of a lot of my work, and why I intend to keep working with astral projection.